Not everybody is in agreement on how much detail an infidelity confession should contain. There is no question that truth should be the basis of any confession but it is possible that too much of it can destroy more rather than rebuild relationships. We are referring to details of the sexual acts committed or answering questions of whether the cheating spouse enjoyed doing it with another or not.
Cheated spouses already have a mental picture of what could have happened in their spouses' illicit relationships. Is it really necessary to put them through the horrors of an account of the sordid details of the affair? Such details may repeatedly block all efforts to save a relationship, coming to mind even where there is no intention to.
Without resorting to any more lies, the cheating spouse should answer the who, what, where, when, why, and how questions of the cheating. Answers to these questions cannot be evaded because several issues have to be settled first before any reconciliation is possible. A couple who is serious about making a go of their relationship after infidelity has been found out can be helped by these answers to prevent similar cheating episodes in the future.
Cheating spouses should resist the temptation to go into details that will only serve to add insult to injury. After the confession, they should concentrate more on making good on their promise not to do it again. Being sorry is a given but it needs to be said and shown by the cheating spouse. This should be the one best heard and stand out in the mind and heart of the cheated spouse.
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